Awhile back, I sent Snapple an email after reading one of those “Snapple Facts” under the cap. I couldnt’ beleive it was true and asked Thor if it was and he said no. So I decided to write them really just to be funny more than anything else. Not only did I not get any free cases of Snapple in the mail, but not even a response! Bastards!
I have a problem regarding your “Real Facts” found inside the cap of my tasty Snapple Beverage. According to Real Fact #70 – caller ID is illegal in the state of California! How can this be?! Millions of people in that state do in fact have caller ID. Are they breaking the law? I have a few friends who live in that state and they in fact have caller ID. If they are breaking the law by having it, and they are my friends, then that makes me an accessory!!! I don’t want to go to jail because one of my friends has caller ID!
I rely on these “Real Facts” to not only further my education, but to also help me in social situations by giving me something to talk about. But if this information you are saying is in fact, incorrect, you will make me look like a fool in public! People will laugh at me and mock me behind my back!
As much as I enjoy your tasty beverages, espcially the Snapple Fire, for it makes you play pinball better, I m not sure i can continue to endorse them if you are telling me things that aren’t true. If this is in fact true, this “Real Fact” #70, then I hope you will not report me to the authrorities for being an accesssory to somone operating caller ID in the state of California.
Thank you for your time and I hope you will remedy this situation by either printing a retraction, or petitioning the govenor of CA to repeal the Caller ID law so millions of people will not be breaking the law.
Actually this was my first draft, I added a bunch of stuff to it such as not wanting to go to prison because I see what happens in prison when I watch Oz and I don’t want those guys doing that to me and the fact that if I use the facts on a date and they were not true, the woman will laugh at me and I will be humiliated. Unfortunately I don’t seem to have a copy of the final product so this will have to do.
So much for the customer is always right 🙁