The Punk Vault

Wrestlemania XX

Last nite was Wrestlemania 20. I had a bunch of people over for it and we all got pizzas. It was a fun time and overall a very good and entertaining show. I can’t beleive that WM is 20 years old. My friend Rich and I went to see the first Wrestlemania on closed circuit TV (this was before they invented pay per view on cable!) at the Odeum in Villa Park when we were 14 years old! Some highlights of the show last nite:

John Cena vs. Big Show: This match was fairly short and frankly I am surprised that it was the opening match. I figured that one of the 4-way tag matches would have been first. Nothing overly special in this match aside from Cena picking up Show twice and giving him the FU. Picking up a 500lb man and holding him up on yr shoulders is an impressive feat in itself. Cena cheated and used one of his big gold hand rings to help win and he is now the new US Champion.

Raw 4-way tag team match for the titles: This match wasn’t bad, but lacked any meaning. It was, and felt, thrown together like an afterthought. Booker T and RVD retained.

Evening gown match with Torrie Wilson/Sable vs. Jackie/Stacy Keibler: A total hot-slut fest. They wrestled in their lingerie. Lots of roll ups and boner-inspiring spots made it a fun match and drool fest. It was a bit short though. I would have been happy if they had a full half hour to roll around on each other.

Chris Jericho vs. Christian: A pretty solid match, these guys worked well together. Eventually Trish came out and “accidently” caused Jericho to lose. After the match, she heeled out on him and sided up with Christian. I saw it coming long before the show, as all the bitches will turn on you sometime in life 😉 It will be interesting to see how well Trish can be a heel.

Victoria vs. Molly (hair vs title match): I really like both these ladies, with Victoria being my current favorite in the WWE. The match could have been a little longer, but it was pretty well done. Much to my shock, Molly jobs to Victoria and has her head shaved. Bald! It didn’t look like they gimmicked her head, it looked legit. It was disturbing to watch, Molly is a fine looking lady, who recently has been looking better than ever, and now she’s bald?! I hope that I just wasn’t able to tell and that they gimmicked up her head.

Smackdown 4-way tag title match: Rikishi/Scotty went over in this match and retained. This was much like the Raw match, it had no real build up and lacked any meaning but the guys put on a decent match nonetheless.

Brock vs. Goldberg: With the fans knowing Brock was quitting the WWE to try his hand at the NFL (idiot!) they were harsh on Brock with their chants of “sellout” and “na na hey hey goodbye”. With Goldberg’s contract being up, and his lack of ring skills, this match was a total suck-fest. This was the only match of the evening that I wish my basement wasn’t fucked and I could have gone and played a game of pinball. After the torture was over, Stone Cold woke the crowd back up by giving a stunner to both guys and downing some beers. I know that working Goldberg is likely difficult since the guy can’t sell, or have a meaningful match and its up to his opponent to try and bring a good match out of him, but I’m sure in this case, Brock probably didn’t give a shit and didn’t bother trying. Goldberg ended up going over in this match. I was betting there would be a no-finish since both guys are leaving, and Stone Cold would have just ended up beating the shit out of them. That’s how I would have booked it, and how they should have too. Maybe the crowd wouldn’t have been chanting “boring” throughout most of the match then.

The smackdown cruiserweight open: A ten man elimination style match. When somone is pinned or submits, a new guy can come in and fight. It should have been longer, it was a lot of fun to watch. Lots of cool spots, and one sick one where kidman damn near killed himself doing a shooting star press. Jamie Knoble actually came out of that match looking like a king, he was on last nite and kicked some ass. Tajiri was jobbed out way too fast, I wanted him to win. Chavo retained the title in a really well done match and one of the best matches of the show.

Undertaker vs. Kane: Taker came back as the much-missed “deadman” complete with Paul Bearer! I marked out for that. The match wasn’t very long, and Taker squashed Kane, and finished with the Tombstone! The crowd popped big for that move as it has been ages since he used it. I thought he made Kane look bad, it was pretty much a squash. I think they should have had more back and forth and made it look like more of a battle. I felt bad for Kane actually but I was glad to see the Taker come out as he should be and not as that stupid biker.

Eddy Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle: A rock solid match by two very skilled and entertaining workers. Lots of back and forth in this match building up to Eddie outsmarting Angle by unlacing his boot so when Kurt tried to put him in the ankle lock, the boot came off, Eddy escaped and rolled Kurt into a small package (and hooking the ropes out of the referee’s vision) to cheat himself a victory.

Chris Benoit vs. HHH vs. Shawn Michales for the heavyweight title: The best match of the evening hands down. Both HHH and HBK were bloody with HBK totally gushing. The Spanish announcer table was the victim of a double suplex applied to Benoit at one point of the match. Lots of back and forth, near falls, interruptions by the third party, etc made for a fun ride. HHH tapped to the crossface, thus putting over Benoit who is now the new world champion. It was a very emotional moment for Benoit as he’s worked for this for years, and had a lifetime of people telling him he wasn’t big enough to be a main eventer. The guy has mad-talent (think Bret Hart) in that ring and what he may lack in mic skills, he more than lets his ring-work do his talking. I was really happy to see him win, the guy totally deserves it, and I look forward to a hopeful fued continuing between him and Shawn Michaels, as those two would put on some stellar matches. All three guys were in top form in this match and all deserve props for the match.

While maybe not the best Wrestlemania of all time, it was a damn fun show to watch and well worth sitting in front of a TV for nearly 5 hours. Hats off to all the guys and gals who busted their asses last nite to put on an entertaining show and to Brock – have fun slapping asses in that gay sport of football, that is if you make it. Personally I think you are a shitfool for quitting when you are on top of your game and have become one of the top guys in the federation in only 2 years of being there! Some guys work thier whole lives in the business and never attain what you have in such a short time.


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